Friday, June 22, 2007

Our Gracious Host

Guest Poster Jan the Intergalactic Aviator

After our meeting with Gordo the Hutt, Bandit and I were herded to another deck and shown to the guest quarters, which appeared to be an unused officer’s room. It was surprisingly nicer than the rest of the steel and gray décor of the ship, but it still looked like an Imperial officer’s room to me.

Bandit, however, whistled at the grandeur of the room. “Sure does look pretty, don’t it?”

“The room?” I asked. “It just looks like a room to me.”

“We are onboard an Imperial Star Destroyer and they gave us this room,” he replied. “We could be in worse places, like the brig.”

“You do have a point there,” I said absently as I started to look around the room. “It doesn’t look like they’re interested in locking us away. Then again, there’s nowhere for us to run.”

“Well look at this,” Bandit whistled again as a panel slid away revealing several expensive-looking dresses. “Maybe you could try one of these on and we can paint the town red? Or at least we can paint the ship red, ha ha.”

“I think that I’ll be fine in what I have on right now.”

“You know, you could stand to loosen up just a little,” Bandit suggested. “Would it kill you to try on a nice dress?”

“I like what I have on,” I replied. “The flight suit is comfortable and functional. What else do I need?”

“What else do you need?” Bandit asked aghast. “What’s the point of living if you don’t look good doing it? What is it going to take for me to get you out of those clothes?”

“More than you’ve got,” I snapped back.

“I’m serious,” he insisted. “You have your pick of nice clothes right here. Would it kill you to try one on?”

I stepped over and looked the outfits up and down. “It might,” I replied with a smile.

Our conversation was interrupted by a pinging at the door. A moment later, it slid open and Captain B’sogg stepped in.
“I trust I am not interrupting,” he presumed.

“Not at all,” Bandit waved him off. “What can I do you for?”

“There will be a reception this evening in honor of the great Gordo,” B’Sogg stated. “You presence is requested.”

“Oh a party, eh?” Bandit grinned. “I’m liking this place more and more already.”

“You will find suitable clothes in your suite,” B’Sogg continued. “As I see you have already discovered. Please feel free to make yourselves more presentable. Food and entertainment is available at all hours at the forward observation level.”

“Food and entertainment? All hours?” Bandit exclaimed. “Now I’m really liking this place.”

“Of course,” B’Sogg grinned calculatingly. “You are our guests here. The BERE Cores have been unloaded and are now being installed onboard. Once they are tested to the great Gordo’s satisfaction, payment will be made and you will may fly off to your next delivery.”

“Sounds good to me,” Bandit beamed. “Like I said, I am always up for a party.”

“Very good,” B’Sogg nodded. “Please join us when you are ready.”

“I have a question,” I said before he could leave.

“And what is it, my lady?”

“When did the Hutts get so cozy with the Empire?”

B’Sogg paused, then a grin crossed his face.

“Ha ha, you are much more observant than one would expect,” he answered. “Observant and daring. Let’s just say that when an admiral has a few heavy gambling debts, handing off the operation of a Star Destroyer to his debtor is one way to pay off those debts.”

A short while later, Bandit and I were on our way to the party. We encountered few officers and troopers, but less than one would imagine on a vessel such as this.

“I am very surprised,” I commented.

“About what’s going on around here?” Bandit asked.

“No, that you actually look pretty good when you dress up a little,” I grinned.

“Hey, I clean up pretty well,” he laughed.

The door slid open to the observation level and the sight of the party was something to behold. A menagerie of strange aliens filled the area, each one stranger than the last. Slimy creatures, lithe dancing girls, snarling bounty hunters, and just about everything else you could imagine that would occupy a Hutt’s entourage was there and they were all drinking and laughing loudly.

“Yeah, I really like this place!” Bandit smiled as he grabbed a drink off the tray of a passing cocktail waitress.


Vegeta said...

Hmm Something seems off.

Jean-Luc Picard said...

I don't trust the Hutts,Jan; be careful.

Vincent Valentine said...

Take everything with several grains of salt.

Skywalker said...

Hutts are as slimy as they look. Trust me, I know.

Dark Jedi Kriss said...

I agree with vegeta on this.

Darth Vader said...

You have to know how to con a hutt to get what you want.

Or just threaten them.

Dr. Zaius said...

How did Captain B’sogg know what the IP address of the door was?