Loading up the ship

Guest Poster: Jan the Intergalactic Aviator

We were loading the power cores into the hold of my ship the Pegasus Elite. Bandit and Chaos were cracking really (really) bad jokes and laughing the entire time.

“So how’s Lonnie?” Chaos asked his partner.

Bandit slapped him in his cheek.

“Ow, what’d you do that for?” Chaos whined.

“Don’t you say that name.” Bo held his finger up close to his partner’s face. “And don’t you even think about slapping me back.”

“Yeah, but howscome you have to slap me?” Chaos said while rubbing his cheek.

“I can slap you because I am the alpha of our dynamic,” he answered. “You know like in a pack of dogs. I’m the alpha; you’re the whatever comes further down the list. Way down the list.”

“A pack of dogs? All I know is after a long day like this, my dogs are barking.”

“I can understand that,” Bandit laughed back. “I’ve smelled your feet, they make me want to bark. Hah ha!”

“That joke was rough. So when do I get to become the alpha?”

“You can’t,” Bandit replied.

“Aw come on.”

“Fine. How about tomorrow.”

“But you’re not going to be here tomorrow!” Chaos complained.

“Fine. How about next Tuesday?”

“Will you be here next Tuesday?”

“Probably not.”

“Well, that’s not any better.”

“OK, how about if you are the alpha whenever I am not around. How’s that sound?”

“That’s better,” Chaos said happily.

“Is that guy OK?” I said quietly, leaning towards Bandit.

“Oh sure,” he assured me. “He’s a little odd, but he gets the job done. You know what I mean?”

Bandit I have figured out. He has the good looks and the easy-going personality which he easily coasts on. Obviously, he turns on the charm with the ladies all the time. I’m not going to fall for it. This Dr. Chaos I can’t quite figure out, though.

“Yeah, but what’s with the costume and everything?” I asked. “It makes him look like he’s insane.”

“I’ll let you in on a little secret – Chaos is not his real name.”

“Really?” I sniffed.

“Of course not,” Bandit continued. “See, whenever he gets nervous, he likes to put that costume on. It’s like a security blanket. He’s a great partner, though. You know we won the Hyperwarp Missile Run last year together?”

“Really?” I asked. That was mildly impressive. The Hyperwarp Missile Run is an illegal race from one end of the galaxy to the other. Essentially, the participants fly from system to system causing as much trouble as they possibly can.

“Sure did,” Bandit beamed. “Couldn’t have done it without Chaos, either. He’s good people. Three or four, by the looks of him. Ha ha!”

“So is Bandit your real name?” I asked, arching an eyebrow at him.

“Ma’am, I will never kiss and tell.” He grinned and bowed slightly.

“Fine,” I replied. “We are not kissing.”

“And I’m not telling,” he grinned.

“The Cores BEREs are loaded,” Chaos ran up to us and reported. “I mean the BERE Cores. Sometimes I say Cores BEREs but I mean BERE Cores, you know that.”

“Now we can load the Bandit,” Bandit said. “Ain’t she a beaut?”

“Not exactly what I expected,” I said while looking the small ship over. “Somehow I thought it would be black with a firebird decal on the hood.”

“Bandit here’s a classic Mark 77 TransGa,” Bandit beamed. “I got her all tuned up and tricked out to fly fast. No smokey can catch me in it.”

“Well, we’ll see,” I said as I made my way to the Elite’s cockpit.