Thursday, February 02, 2006

Team Selection, Part 2

The General and I reconvened to screen candidates for the mission. We had a lot more to look over and we wanted to get right to it. After that, it'll be some training then off to the mission where it'll be game over for Baltizar.

Hudson: Who's this?

General: This is Private Archer J. Maggot. He's a bit of a quiet religious man. He is actually in military prison right now. Should you select him, and upon successful completion of this mission, he would receive a full pardon.

Hudson: A quiet religious man looking for redemption? I can't see what could possibly go wrong with having him on this team. He's in.

General: This is the Mariner. He can breathe underwater.

Hudson: Lame. Next.

General: This is Tank Girl. She is an armor specialist, obviously.

Hudson: Most obnoxious... voice... ever.

Hudson: Who's this, sir?

General: This is CJ, he went AWOL from the Marines to play bass for a punk rock band.

Hudson: And he can stay with them.

General: Lenina Huxley. She is a member of the San Angeles Police Department.

Hudson: I want her! Er, I mean, I want her to be a part of the team. She should fit right in, yeah.

General: OK, that's five team members, we need one more to complete the squad. These two guys come highly recommended by their current commander. It seems that she can't wait to send them off on a mission. They're a team, though.

Hudson: Eh, I'd hate to break up a team, you know, sir.

General: This is TDK1138.

Hudson: Pass. It's universally known that these guys can't hit anything that they're firing at.

General: This is another armor specialist. He goes by the name of Oddball.

Hudson: I don't know. I suppose that we may need some armor support. Let's see who else is available, we may come back to him.

General: Hmmm, OK. This is Agent Smith. He's actually a killer computer program.

Hudson: Ah, no thanks.

General: This is Private Taylor. He dropped out of college to join the infantry, but soon he'll be forced to make a moral decision whether to follow the by-the-book-but-evil Sergeant Barnes or the flout-the-rules-smoke-weed-and-do-good Sergeant Grodin.

Hudson: Well I don't think that it would be right for us to keep him from that decision.

General: This is Todd. He has been trained since birth to be a perfect soldier. He will fight to the death for you, but will probably only say 108 words throughout the entire mission.

Hudson: Boring. I guess that I'll take Oddball. We could use the heavy duty backup, I suppose. That makes it six for the mission, My Dirty Half Dozen.

General: Then let's get the troops together and start training.


Anonymous said...

I wanna hire Ms Huxley, ya cant have her............

There are a few in that group that you better not turn back on !!

Wedge Antillies said...

Dirty Half-dozen? It looks more like a 'Sympathetic Six', or a bad 'Our Gang' remake.

Good luck, Private Hudson!

A Army Of (Cl)One said...

"It's universally known that these guys can't hit anything that they're firing at"

That why I don't aim at things i want to hit. Clever like a fox ina a cooking contest..wait that doesn't make any sence...let's see: clever like a.. .i'll get back to you on that

Professor Xavier said...

Good thing you're bringing a lot of cannon fodder. These resort towns can get pretty nasty.

Jango Fett said...

I have some advice never fire at a Clone tropper. They get all mad and attack you without a blaster. :)

Anonymous said...

you should of chose Todd its the silent types that are the best *giggles* oh well todd can come a mission with me *drools*

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