Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Still working on that escape thing...

Guest Poster Jan the Intergalactic Aviator

By assuring the Imperial troopers that we would actually get them back to the Empire, they made it easy for us to escape getting thrown out an airlock. Bandit and I aren’t out of the proverbial woods yet as we have to get back to my ship the Pegasus Elite and get off this Star Destroyer. Our luck is holding out though, despite the announcements of our escape over the loudspeakers, none of the ship’s crew or the armored troops were anywhere to be seen. Despite this, I doubt that our luck will hold. We still have Gordo the Hutt’s court, mercenaries, and other various sycophants to contend with.

“Pretty slick move, pretty lady,” Bandit panted as we ran across the steel deck of the corridor. “We’re lucky that the Hutt agreed to have you spaced.”

“I was lucky he took the bait,” I replied. “But he’d have to if he wanted to keep the troops onboard happy.”

“I didn’t even know you were in the Queen’s Royal Navy,” he chuckled.

“I guess there’s a lot that you don’t know about me,” I laughed back. “Like my ability to talk my way out of a situation.”

“So you weren’t—?” A big grinned cracked across Bandit’s face. “You mean you—Hoo wee, you sure pulled the wool over their eyes! Ha hah!”

“Gotta be fast on your feet sometimes, whoouhllff!” The wind was unexpectedly knocked out of me. My back smacked the wall as the rifle I was carrying clattered to the deck.

“I’ll kill you now!” B’Sogg growled angrily. A knife gleamed in his hand.

I looked over at Bandit, he too was engaged with one of the Hutt’s guards. I didn’t have any more time to think about it as the blade slashed towards my stomach.

“That’s no way to treat a lady,” I managed to quip as I dodged out of the way of B’Sogg’s strike. I chopped his hand with the edge of mine and the knife clanged to the ground.

“You stupid cow!” B’Sogg cursed as he shook the stinging sensation out of his hand. “You’ll pay for that!”

He lunged at me again but I side stepped the attack and drove the heal of my boot into the side of his knee. With a sickening crunch, his knee collapsed and he dropped to the ground howling in pain. I quickly picked up the rifle and shot him twice in the back.

“You finished with your dancing partner yet?” I called out to Bandit.

“Hang on a sec, sweetheart.” Bandit dug his heal into the guard’s toe and quickly followed up with an uppercut that sent his opponent sprawling backwards. I finished the guard off with a blast from my rifle as well.

“Wow that’s cold, shootin’ a man in the back like that and all,” Bandit whistled.

“It’s set to stun.” I held up the rifle for him to see the settings. “Let’s go, the landing bay’s that way.”

We quickly ran to the bay and I skidded to a halt in front of a computer station. I pulled my sonic screwdriver out of my cargo pocket and I started working the terminal.

“What are you doing?” Bandit asked. “Guards could be here any minute!”

“Just a second, I have to ensure that we’ll get out of here,” I answered.

“Hurry!” he urged.

“Got it!” I yelled as the terminal pinged and scrolled through a script on the monitor.

We quickly dashed into my ship and I revved the engines just as the Hutt’s mercenaries began firing from the hanger doors. Blaster fire ricocheted from the Pegasus Elite’s hull as I returned fire from my front cannon.

“Wait! The Bandit’s on the deck over there!” Bandit yelled. “That’s my ship, we gotta go get it!”

The Elite lifted up off the deck and dropped down through the open bay doors. Her main engines flared to life and we rocketed away from our pursuers.

“My ship!” Bandit wailed.

“You want to go back and get it?” I asked.

Bandit’s howl dropped down into an unrecognizable mumble. Then he looked at the readings from the copilot’s seat. “The Star Destroyer’s persuing us! Weapons are powering up!”

“Hang on!” I gritted my teeth.

I began evasive maneuvers as I hoped beyond hope that my hack job would take effect before we’re reduced to space dust.


Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

Shoot a torpedo up their tailpipe. That's what I always do.

Dark Jedi Kriss said...

Yeah, that works. A detoator works nicely.

Jean-Luc Picard said...

It's a good Enterprise tactic.