Friday, May 12, 2006

Death City Death Trap

We were walking through the corridors looking for the turbolift when something caught my eye.

"What's this?" I step closer to it.

"It looks like a command terminal to this station," Jan the Intergalactic Aviator said.

"What's this sign?" Private Hudson pulled the taped-up sign and took a look. "Death City Command Station 4. Hey, if we can hack into this, we can get the layout of the station!"

"What's this?" I looked at another sign.

"Wet paint," Jan read. "Jeez, the paint isn't even dry on this place yet and this guy's trying to take us down."

"Well, we'll just have to take him down first." I replied with grim determination.

"I'm in!" Hudson announced. "Here's the layout of the station."

"There's the command center on the top level," I pointed. "No doubt we'll find our mysterious enemy there."

"Look there," Jan pointed to another spot on the virtual map. "Top Secret GNAT Laboratory on level 5. What do you suppose that is?"

"Gnats? yuck," declared Hudson. "I'll stay away from there, thank you."

"I don't know," I answered. "I'm still convinced that we need to go to the command center."

"Here's the Tractor Beam Console," Hudson pointed. "I'll go shut that down. You guys can go hit the command center."

"Isn't it foolish to split up?" Jan asked.

"Who's more foolish?" Hudson replied. "The fool, or the fool who fools the fool?"

"Mmmm..... yeah," I reply. "OK, Hudson, you want to take out the tractor beam? Go for it, Jan and I will head to the top."

"What's this?" Jan pointed to another point on the screen. "It looks like an exhaust shaft. I bet that if we could destroy that, it will cause a chain reaction that will blow up the whole station!"

"I don't know how we're going to get to that, though," I squinted at it. "It's so small, no ship could fit into that trench."

"Well, if we can get it, I'll bet that's the Death City's Achilles heel," shrugged Jan. "If we need to, and if we can get to it, we should."

As the three of us hashed out our plan of action, Dr. Chronobob watched over us from his lab via his telemonitor.

"They are going to the command station," A metallic voice proclaimed quite pleased.

"Yes, oh Dark Lord," Chronobob replied. "Except for the Marine. He's heading for the tractor beam controls. Are you going to go kill him there?"

"No, I think I shall let him go. NOT!" The cloaked figure snorted. "I will first destroy the two who are walking into my trap, then kill that last one at my leisure. Without Jon, Hudson will literally be a sitting duck!"

"Yes, My Lord," Chronobob affirmed. The sinister scientist dared not correct the dark lord's misuse of the word literally. And once again, his evil master's plans seemed so elaborate and overdone. Nonetheless, the evil scientist had a job to do, and that job he did gleefully. He reached over to the Galvanizing Neural Age Transducer and turned the dial towards the "little boy" setting.


Jaina Solo said...

Galvanizing Neural Age Transducer!! Little Boy setting!!!

Nooooo!!!! It's the most powerful weapon in the universe!!!

A Army Of (Cl)One said...

No No NO, Mr. Evil dark overlord fellow. Kill Hudson first. I think he is even wearing a red shirt. Come on Man do the right thing.

*give Hudson the thumbs up*

Anonymous said...

The Little Boy Setting !!

How Immature !!

Such Childish Behavior for a dark Lord !

Private Hudson said...

*smiles and gives thumbs up back*

Professor Xavier said...

That is literally the one zillionith time I have seen someone misuse the word literally.

JawaJuice said...

You mean that’s it? That’s all that huge space station is there for? To protect a little dial for a Galvanizing Neural Age Tranducer? Really?
….um….can I get one to protect my comic book collection?

Anonymous said...

anyone bring crayons?

Jean-Luc Picard said...

Where did you get your clip board from?

Gyrobo said...

I need to galvanize some neurones.