Friday, May 19, 2006

We made our way back towards Jan's ship

Along the way, we found Hudson.

"Tractor beam off?" I asked Hudson.

"Sure is," he replied. "I took out some troops along the way, too."

"Really?"

"Yup," he nodded. "Totally quiet and sneaky-like. I am like Snake Eyes, a stone cold totally quiet killer. They never saw me coming."

"So you're silent but violent?" I asked.

"You got it," he grinned, full of pride.

I stopped.

"Wait a minute, what's today's date?"

"You mean on Earth, or the Queen's Galactic Calendar?" asked Jan.

"On Earth," I replied. I dialed up the calendar on my Wristcomm. "Hey, it's May 19th!"

"So?" shrugged Hudson.

"Tomorrow is my one year blogoversary!" I answered, allowing for more excitement than my current situation should allow.

"Oh, well, happy blogoversary," said Hudson.

"Yes, happy blogoversary," smiled Jan. Then she looked down. "I don't have a blog."

"Maybe some day you will," I answered. "Hey, why don't we take a look at my first post."

Jan and Hudson nodded in agreement and I called up my blog on my Wristcomm, then went to the first entry:

I fought Lord EyeBorg today (I believe "Lord" is an honorarium, he does not actually lord over anything). Though he is easily 30 years my senior and no match for my strength, his cybertetic claw and optic laser blast make him a tough opponent to be sure. After battling back and forth for over an hour, I finally got a solid punch in. The force of my strike sent him sprawling and he was stunned long enough for me to pluck his laser-firing eyepiece from it's socket.



Holding the weapon aloft, I yelled to the crowd "The 'eyes' have it!" The audience was beside itself, roaring and cheering my victory.

Victory, thy taste is sweet.

"That was... nice," Jan said.

"I liked that action hero line," Hudson smiled. "The eyes have it! The eyes have it! The eyes have it!"

"Yeah, well, sometimes I need work on those lines." I looked out past the fourth wall. "I want to thank everyone who's visited me here for the past year. You know who you are, go on stand up and give yourselves a big hand. Great. Now, just the ladies. Now just the men. Now just the men pretending to be ladies. Ha, I got you! Now you two in the back! Go on, stand up and clap."

Thank you.

15 comments:

flu said...

*applause*

Intergalatic Gladiator, thy name is Jon.

Congrats on the milestone.

I've enjoyed the entire ride, even the silly stuff.

Wedge Antillies said...

Yes, Jon, you have improved with age. Now your posts only make me gag, rather than a full puke :-)

Congrats to you and your blogoversary. One year in blogging is a real achievement.

Karnov said...

TEN CASES OF BEER! AWESOME!

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

Fluke, what silly stuff?

Thank you, Wedge.

Thanks for sticking around, Karnov. 10 cases of beer will indeed be at my house tomorow. Feel free to stop by.

Local Henchmen 432 said...

Dear Sir,

Happy Blogoversary

I still have Hudson's credits if you want to party.I think there are 10 credits left.Oh well.Dental for all.

Dr.Polaris rules.

Jaina Solo said...

Happy Blogoversary Jon!

Many you have many more!

A Army Of (Cl)One said...

*sings* Happy Blogoversary to you, Happy Blogoversary to you, Happy Blogoversary to yoooooou, Happy Blogoversary to you *stops singing*

Tha tword doesn’t roll of the tounge to easliey does it.

Vampirella said...

HAPPY BLOG BIRTHDAY

Vampirella said...

try again
happy bday

Vegeta said...

Happy blogerversry It's been a wild ride

Jabafatboy said...

Well nobody can accuse you of being full of it anymore.

You have spent an entire year letting it out.

Now yer just Semi-full of it .

:-) Hehehehehehehehehe

Jean-Luc Picard said...

Cheers all round!

Kristi said...

Congrats Jon! I've had many laughs reading your blog over the past year. :)

Professor Xavier said...

One year! Wow, that is some amazing stick-to-itiveness. I for one sleep well knowing that you've been battling evil in the galaxy. Congratulations!

Lori said...

Someone told me there was 10 cases of beer....Sooo I had to stop by....LOL

Congrats on 1 year....hope the next year is as funnnn errrrr I mean as you would say *rocket surgery*!!!

Have a great day!!!