Return to Hacknor (honest)

I got back to Planet Hacknor were I was going to resume my intergalactic gladiating duties. Hudson was there, and he had the goofiest grin on his face.

"What are you smiling about?" I asked. "You look like Sylvester with a mouth full of Tweety."

"I can't tell you," he smirked. Then he leaned closer. "Top secret."

"Oh," I replied. "It almost looks to me like you were on some kind of classified mission that was later deemed illegal, almost kicked out of the Colonial Marines, but then awarded a certificate of achievement or something."

Hudson's smile dropped. He was silent for few moments.

"It was a certificate of appreciation," he answered flatly. Then he changed the subject. "So tell me, how did you do on Big Brother: Naboo? The final couple weeks haven't aired here yet."

"Oh, I can't tell you," I said. Then it was my turn to lean in closer. "I signed a form that says I can't divulge the ending until it airs."

"Aw come on," Hudson pleaded. "We're a team, Abbot and Costello, Flint and Lady Jaye, Hall and Oates. You can tell me."

"Nope. Nice try, though."

I walked away and soon met my good friend Starkey Al-Hvmmmmm in the hallway.

"Welcome back, friend Jon!" He roared and slapped me on the back. "You are very brave warrior, taking on those pirates, yes?"

"Well, it was tough," I answered. "Somehow, I just knew that I would prevail though."

"Ho ho, yes," Starkey roared. "Big Brother was very fun and exciting! I have but one question, though."

"What?"

"Did you emerge victorious at the game? The ending has not been seen by me yet."

"Oh, I can't tell you," I answered. "I signed a form."

"Is it form like J'onn Sinew Nu's forms?" he asked.

"Oh yeah," I harrumphed. "Just as bad."

"Oh, then you are lucky that you did not sign your entrails away!"

"No kidding," I chuckled. I then made my way to the aforementioned Sinew Nu's office.

"Jon, Jon, Jon," Sinew Nu smiled. He smiled like he was ready to pounce. "You did great on that show. You represented the Intergalactic Gladiating Entertainment (formerly the Intergalactic Gladiating Federation) very well."

"Thanks," I answered. "It was good to see some of my buddies again."

"The only thing is," Sinew Nu said.

OK, he's going to ask, too. I rolled my eyes. "Yes?"

"Did you win?" he asked.

"I can't tell you," I said. "I signed a form."

"Aw, you can tell me," he asserted. "I won't tell anyone."

"Sorry. I just can't."

"Hey, I'm your boss," he answered. "You have to tell me."

"I can't, I signed a form."

"Oooh," he puckered his lips then frowned. "Is it like one of mine?"

"Yeah."

"Heh heh, you're lucky that you got out of there with you gizzard intact."

"Well fortunately, I don't have a gizzard," I answered.

"Hey, I don't know much about your crazy Earth physiology," he snorted. "Which reminds me, you have another appointment with Dr. Destiny. You can see him tomorrow."

"Great," I walked out of the office and made my way back to my quarters. There I was pinged by the comm system.

"Hello?"

"You have a call from Her Majesty Queen Galacta," said the comm tech.

From the Queen? This must be important!

"Put her through!" I said quickly.

"Gladiator, so good to speak to you again," came the Queen's voice over the radio. "You represented your galaxy very well on Big Brother: Naboo."

"Thank you, Your Majesty," I answered. "It was a very interesting experience."

"I have just one question," She said.

"Yes?"

"Did you win?"