Monday, October 17, 2005

Jo Jo, a Funeral for a Comedy Relief Sidekick

The funeral for Jo Jo was on Planet Monkekbok today, all the Monkeyboys were there. Suprisingly, it was a solemn event. The Monkekbok Institute of Training Sidekicks sent the Monkeyboy Tabernacle Choir to sing, you would probably not be surprised to hear that they sang "Yes, We Have No Bananas" as a funeral dirge.

"Yes, we have no bananas
We have-a no bananas today.
Just try those coconuts
Those walnuts and doughnuts
There ain't many nuts like they.
We'll sell you two kinds of red herring,
Dark brown, and ball-bearing.
But yes, we have no bananas
We have no bananas today."

Needless to say, it was something. The choir then sang Jo Jo's theme. All 52 verses. They finished it with a new verse just for the occasion.

"Jo Jo the Monkeyboy, he is gone at the break of dawn
Oblah dee oblah dah-ah la la la life goes on"

Part of that song seemed awfully familiar, I don't know I was overseas when that one show was on television, though.

After that, Jo Jo's little brother Mojo read The Ode to Jo Jo, composed by a special friend of the Monkeboys:

Where did you go, Jo Jo?
And did you know, Jo Jo
This, your last foe, Jo Jo
Would beat you so, Jo Jo?
You were too slow, Jo Jo.
Say it ain't so, Jo Jo.

Mojo ended it and with a sniff and said "Thank you, Bill. Now as a special official Monkeyboy Special Friend, you are entitled to have a Monkeyboy sidekick fow ever and ever and ever. Jo Jo would've wanted it that way."

Many of the Monkeyboys looked up anxiously, hoping some sort of divine choosing pointer device would select them. They resumed their somber looks when there was none.

At the end of the service, Schlocky the Monkeyboy came up to me to have a few words.

"Vhy dese kids dese days," he said.

"Yeah, these kids," I reply. What am I supposed to say?

"Jo Jo wanted you to have this," Schlocky continued. He handed me a box.

I looked inside, it was his daiquiri blender.

"Thanks," I look at the blender. "I guess daiquiris are on me, huh?"

Schlocky's eyes lit up.

"Hey everybody!" he called out. "Jon's makin' daiquiris! Let's all go to his ship!"


Captain Typho said...

I never knew that "Yes, We Have No Bananas" could be so moving.


flu said...

He loaded six foot, seven foot, eight foot, bunch!

But the daylight come n' de tally man go home.

Professor Xavier said...

Nothing like a funeral to bring out the alcoholic in a person. I'm guessing those were banana daiquiris, right?

JawaJuice said...

Jo Jo is....DEAD?!?!!
How can this be?
reads other posts
I'm gone for a few weeks and Jo Jo dies?
This is tragic!!!!!
This....this just can't be happening! He was so full of banana side-kickish!
I just can't belive he's actually...dead.

He still owes me twenty credits.

eh...Jon...since he was your side-kick and all...any chance of seeing that money?

Bill said...

Wow, a Monkeybok Special Friend! I'm so honored...I think.

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

Prof X -- of course they were banana daiquiris, as far as I've ever seen that's the only type that a MOnkeyboy would drink.

JJ -- I suppose that I can send you that twenty credits that Jo Jo owed you, but what about that 30 that you owe me?

Bill -- Be afraid, be very afraid!