Friday, October 21, 2005

A meeting of the minds*

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"You must stop this fighting at once," said The Professor. "Jon, you will soon understand that we are on the same side."

I looked at Cyclops, he was standing there with balled up fists but he wasn't moving.

"I was defending myself against his attacks. If we're supposed to be allies, why were we even fighting in the first place?"

"That is rule number one when two heroes meet in a crossover. They must first fight an epic battle to get the fanboys salivating."

"But we fought to a standstill," I said, eyeing Professor X and Cyclops warily. "Seems pointless to me."

"Of course, the second rule is that the fight must end in a draw unless one of the combatants is under a spell, mind control, or his abilities are altered by an outside source. The heroes can then team up together to defeat their common foe."

"I see," I said. "Sort of."

Cyclops relaxed and looked at me through his ruby quartz eye piece, without which, his optic blasts would be uncontrollably unleashed. "I apologize for attacking you first, Jon. But it is the rule."

"OK, I understand. I'm no stranger to seeing heroes battle each other in crossover situations." I shook my finger. "But don't let it happen again."

"Oh, I won't," Cyclops chuckled and slapped me on the shoulder.

"Jon, I have seen in one of your entries that you have unique powers. Powers that, because of their nature, went unnoticed by me until very recently. You have abilities that we need to save the Earth."

Well, I have saved Earth before,** I guess that I can do it again.

"We have found that the Brood*** is on Earth, my teams have been dispatched to hunt them down,**** but we found something more."

"What is it?" I asked.

"We have found that an asteroid near Jupiter that has a technologically advanced outpost on it, it appears to have been built at some point by the Shi'ar ***** as an observation and science station of sorts."

"An asteroid like Asteroid M?" I asked. ******

"Similar in ways, we've dubbed it Asteroid X," The Professor answered.

"It's 11 times worse than Asteroid M." added Cyclops.

What's with these guys and their X's? "And you need my help to take it out?"

"Yes, but there's more," Professor X continued. "We have reason to believe that the station there also has Sentinel******* technology on it, so it would be able to detect mutants. With your unique powers, they would not be able to detect you."

"Yeah, about those abilities..."

"I have selected Cyclops and the Beast to accompany you on the mission, if we could use your ship the Danger Sled, they would not recognize it as a threat. The outpost's shielding will repel any attacks on it, so you need to get inside the base to stop them."

"That doesn't sound too tough," I say. I have to add a little bravado for all of my Junior Intergalactic Gladiators out there. ********

"Remember, the Brood is a highly dangerous race, more dangerous than you can imagine." Xavier cautioned. "They are a hive mind and they exist solely to further their feral species."

"Dangerous, hive, feral. Got it." I answer.

"I am serious," Xavier insisted. "Before you go, do you have any questions?"

"Just one. Did you know that you look an awful lot like Captain Picard?" ********


*And by "Meeting of the Minds," I meant Professor X's very powerful mutant mind and my regular Intergalactic Gladiator mind.

** See in my blog Space Battle Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4 and 5.

*** The Brood, an alien race who's entire existence is devoted to hunger and procreation.

**** As chronicled in Professor Xavier's blog.

***** The Shi'ar, an advanced race of aliens who rule their own interstellar empire.

****** Asteroid M, constructed by Magneto to be a haven for mutants.

******* Sentinels, robots designed to hunt mutants.

******** Jr. Intergalactic Gladiators, all of my fans and the regular readers of this blog.

********* Jean Luc Picard, Captain of the Starship Enterprise.


Captain Typho said...

I don't see how you're going to survive this without Jo Jo.

Good luck.

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

You have a good point there, who's going to shut down the fusion reactor before it blows up if Jo Jo's gone?

Thumper said...

...I am so totally going to have to go read past blog entire...!

here via Michele's!

Karnov said...

You could go to a temp agency and hire a temp.

flu said...

hold on... so I'm a Jr. Intergalactic Gladiator by definition?

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

Fluke, I would say yes except you totally defy all definition.

Miss Cow is a Cow said...

hello michele sent me

Professor Xavier said...

I just wanted to say that I am very grateful you have taken this vital mission on, Jon. Your journey will be fraught with unspeakable danger, but I know that with all of your unique abilites, you and Cyclops and Beast will be able to uncover the mysteries of Asteroid X and save the Earth.

Pieces of Me said...

Hey I am here from Michele's and have no clue what you are talking about...LOL

flu said...

I thought the first rule was: you don't talk about it.

Jean-Luc Picard said...

Saving the earth seems to be a full time job for you, myself and the Professor.

Obi-Wan Kenobi said...

Hey dere! Keep the fight goin'!

Professor Xavier said...

I am looking forward to hearing how your adventure with Cyclops and Beast turns out on Asteroid X.

Master Yoda said...

Familiar with the "The first thing you do is fight rule" I am.

Of the time the Jedi teamed up with Charlie's Angels, this reminds me. Just like your experience here it was.

MissMeliss said...

Hi, Michele sent me, and I'm glad she did, because this entry was vastly entertaining.