Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Galactor the Evil Galactic Overlord stalked towards me.

Evil encased in darkness encased in despair A low rumbling eminated from his throat.

I aimed my Commlink and fired the grappling hook at him. The minute harpoon pierced the seam between the torso and shoulder on his black armor. An evil gas hissed from the puncture as Galactor gasped and stumbled back.

As the overlord staggered back, I rushed up and pushed him further until we hit a window.

With a crash, the giant plate glass shattered and we both tumbled out. I managed to grasp the edge of the window frame as Galactor tumbled towards the ground. The monofilament cable snapped taut! I was caught holding the window ledge with an extremely heavy villain swinging a mere 10 meters below me.

Talis rushed up and grabbed my arm; he was joined by one of the Royal Commandos who was fortunately not injured from the attack. With our effort, the three of us managed to haul me back into the laboratory, my arm and the cable still running stretched tight out the window.

“Curse you, Earthman!” Galactor’s voice rumbled from outside, then the cable snapped free of his weight.

I leaned over the ledge and looked. I was joined by the Technomage and the commando. We didn’t see sign of Galactor anywhere.

“You did it, Gladiator!” exclaimed Talis. “You’ve beaten Galactor!”

Hudson poked his head out from behind a doorway. “He did?”

“I was lucky,” I said grimly. “I have a feeling that he’ll be back.”

Galactor’s fleet quickly cut and ran from the engagement. The ships that could, leaped into hyperspace. The Queen’s Royal Troops stormed the castle, liberated the indentured mages and captured any of the Overlord’s troops that remained.

With the all clear signaled, Her Majesty toured the edifice to survey the area Herself.

“Today is a glorious day, Intergalactic Gladiator!” She announced. “You truly have proven yourself a hero to the galaxy once again.”

“You sly dog,” Hudson punched me in the shoulder.

“Well, it’s not over,” I said. “Galactor got away.”

“Do not worry,” Queen Galacta said. “We shall have another opportunity to do just that. My evil brother will hatch another plot soon, perhaps in one week’s time.”

“What I don’t understand is, there’s a whole Mirror Universe out there where everything is the exact opposite of ours. Right?”

“That is correct,” Talis nodded.

“And there are evil duplicates of everyone here, doing everything that we do, but opposite.”

“That is also correct,” affirmed the Technomage.

“OK, so what was the Good Galactor doing while Evil Galactor was creating the vortex?”

“I hadn’t thought of that,” the sorcerer stroked his beard.

“And if everything that happens here happens there, but totally opposite, what was the Evil Galacta doing during this whole epidsode?”

“Hmmm,” contemplated the mage.

Everyone was silent for a while.

“Perhaps it is best that you simply don’t think about it,” he offered. “Clearly, few others have.”


Master Yoda said...

At least have to fight Evil Jo Jo the Monkeyboy, you did not.

Anonymous said...

Hey where do i sign up ? That is one beautifull queen !!

Oh and by the way , that monkey obi brought home ... that is jojo the evil monkey boy ..

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

Would the Evil Jo Jo the Monkeyboy actually be funny?

Professor Xavier said...

Ok, so I know that you can always tell the evil versions of the guys from the good versions by their evil goatees. But how do you tell the evil and good versions of the ladies apart?

Wedge Antillies said...

Yes, the paradox of the parallel universe. Makes your head hurt, doesn't it.

An professor, I believe for women that the evil versions have longer hair and cheaper makeup, but that may be a rumor.

Anonymous said...

okay jon I have a question if you are confined to naboo house on naboo big brother
how did you do all this? or is it all a rerun :P we never saw before

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator said...

All the mysteries of time and space.

Lt. Cmdr Oneida said...

Professor, an answer to your question. Cheap fake nails that look like talons and tend to be painted outrageous colors. That's always how you can tell. For enhancing their ability to cat fight, or when they employ the fighting style 'b*%@!, my man ain't yo baby's daddy'

flu said...

Hmp... I know plenty of evil girls with facial hair.

NandeHi said...

Thank you for stopping by the Jedi Temple!!! Come see me again.

Lori said...

I think I'll take the advice...and not think about it...LOL

Have a great day!!!!