Friday, June 16, 2006


At the Triple Rock Church.

MC: And now, this weeks sermon is from our beloved the Reverend Cleophis James.

REV: And now people. And now people. When I woke up this morning, I heard a disturbing sound. I said, when I woke up this morning I heard a disturbing sound. What I heard was the jingle-jangle of a thousand lost souls. And I'm talking about the souls of all the men and women, departed from this life. Wait a minute, the Lord says the souls of us here on earth is, secret of divine life, they'll not find. Because it's too late... too late yeah, too late for them to ever see again, the light they once chose not to follow, don't be lost when the time comes. For the day of the Lord cometh, out of deep in the night.
Amen. Amen.

Song - The Old Landmark (congregation singing and dancing).

ELWOOD: Jo Jo, you alright?

[Ray of sunlight shines through the church onto Jo Jo.]

JO JO: The band.. (louder) The band..
REV: Do you see the light?
JO JO: (louder) The band!
REV: Do you see the light?
ELWOOD: What light?
REV: Have you seen the light?
JO JO: Yes, Yes! Cheesy J. goooly ding banana crunch, I have seen the light!

[Jo Jo starts dancing with the others.]

JO JO: The band Elwood. The band!
ELWOOD: The band? ... The band. The band? The band!
REV: Praise God.
ELWOOD: And God bless the United States of America.
Jo Jo and Elwood, in their car.
Song - Soothe me (In the background.)

JO JO: We'll put the band back together, do a few gigs, we get some bread. Bang! Five thousand bucks.
ELWOOD: Yeah, well, getting the band back together might not be that easy.
JO JO: What're you talking about?
ELWOOD: They split, they all took straight jobs.
JO JO: Yeah so you know where they are. You said you were gonna keep in touch with them
ELWOOD: I got a coupla leads, a few phone numbers, but I mean, how many of them visited or even wrote you huh?
JO JO: They're not the kinda guys who write letters. You were outside, I was inside, you were s'posed to keep in touch with the band. I kept asking you if we were gonna play again.
ELWOOD: Well, what was I gonna do? Take away you're only hope? Take away the very thing that kept you going in there? I took the liberty of ballooeyshalloeying you, okay?
JO JO: You lied to me.
ELWOOD: It wasn't lies, it was just balloeyshalloey.

[Jo Jo and Elwood are in the car, and go through a yellow traffic light. Police lights flash in the rear view mirror.]

ELWOOD: Snooker shangle shoop!
JO JO: What?
ELWOOD: Rollers.
JO JO: No?
JO JO: Shangle snooker shoop.

[Elwood pulls over as directed and an officer approaches the car.]

ELWOOD: What? What did I do?
OFFICER DANIEL: You failed to stop at a red signal.
ELWOOD: The light was yellow sir.
OFFICER DANIEL: May I see your license please?

[He takes the license back to the squad car.]

JO JO: Goobergrape!
ELWOOD: Man I haven't been pulled over in six months. I bet those cops have got SCMODS.
ELWOOD: State, County, Municipal, Offender, Data, System.

[The two officers return to Jo Jo and Elwood's car.]

OFFICER DANIEL: Elwood, we show your license currently under suspension. Step out of the car please.

[Elwood starts the car and drives off. The officers run back to their car and follow.]

JO JO: First you trade the Caddilac for a microphone, then you lie to me about the band, now you're gonna put me right back in the joint.
ELWOOD: They're not gonna catch us. We're on a mission from God.
JO JO: Elwood!
OFFICER MOUNT:(into CB) We are in high speed pursuit northbound on Cortlen Avenue. Black and white 1974 Dodge sedan with Illinios plates. Request assistance.


Vegeta said...

This movie makes less and less sense

Anonymous said...

hmmmm next they will be in space stealing water or was it ice

Local Henchmen 432 said...

When will it stop... the madness,the madness...

Jaina Solo said...

Oooo.... I'm so confused....
My head hurts...

Kristi said...

*waits for the scene where Carrie Fisher tries to shoot Jo Jo*

Jean-Luc Picard said...

Explanation required; please write carefully.

Local Henchmen 432 said...

We are on a mission from God.

A Army Of (Cl)One said...

Please tell this does not end with Jo Jo dead in a sleazy Hacknorwood hotel after shooting eight balls all night and then all we are left with is a few great movies, some TV shows and his talentless brother (jon jon) breaking into show business based only on his dead sibling name.